Remember my obsession with vacuuming? No? Refresh your memory. See http://wp.me/p317Rq-2R.
A few weeks ago, while vacuuming for the millionth time in my life, I started to smell a funny smell. No not that kind of smell (although I could write a whole other entry on farts, but I am pretty sure no one wants to read that), but an electrical type smell. If that’s even a type of smell. Shortly thereafter the rug attachment to my beloved vacuum, Charlie, stopped working. Well it sort of worked if you held the handle just right and kind of squeezed the wire on the hose. That doesn’t make sense to anyone but me but you’ll just have to trust me on this one. It worked. But not well.
A partially functioning vacuum is unacceptable for someone like me so this weekend I decided to take a skip out to Sears while the kids were napping to pick up a new one. (By the way, their Dad was home. I didn’t just leave them with the cat as a babysitter. Or did I? Food for thought…)
I didn’t have much in mind. My only criteria was that it be a canister vacuum because uprights seem so clunky and hard to maneuver (I spelled that word right, first shot. Amazing). I arrive at Sears and am greeted by four lovely men working in the “small appliance” section. Want to know what this includes? Vacuums, sewing machines, mattresses, and microwaves. What in the world (WITW…has that caught on yet? Chick-A and I have been pushing hard for that one. Can we all just get on board? Do we get any sort of royalties for that? Can you patent an acronym?)? What was Sears thinking there? “You know what would make total sense. Salesmen that specialize in vacuums AND sewing machines.” When did mattresses become an appliance?
Anyway. These gentlemen were quite excited to see me. I don’t think much goes on in this section, even on a Sunday. I started with the Kenmore I already owned, figuring that would be what I’d wind up with. I’m a creature of habit. Not as much as Chick-A. I actually eat different breakfasts each day (see http://wp.me/p317Rq-6c to revisit Chick-A’s mental health issues). I can handle that sort of change. But I’ve owned a Kenmore canister vacuum my entire adult life so it seemed to make sense to go that route.
Well guess what? Dyson makes a canister. And that sucker is amazing (enjoy the pun). The salesman plugged it in, dumped a bunch of crap (hair, dust, dirt, I think there was even some megablocks in there) on the ground, and up it went. Like freaking magic. And you know what else? You don’t need a separate rug attachment. I know 95% of you reading this absolutely do not give a crap. But for the 5% of you that do…this is life changing. I mean, to go from hardwood floors to carpet without skipping a beat?? I am pretty sure I wasn’t even this happy on my wedding day (sorry Pete – love you so much baby).
I vacuumed until my family told me I had to stop. And then, all night when the baby would wake me up, all I could think about was vacuuming some more. I can’t wait to get home today. I hope while I was gone the cat make a friggen’ mess of the place.
Take my advice people. Pick one of these babies up. They’re a little pricey. Well for a sane individual they are. For me, there is no amount of money too high for an amazing vacuuming experience. Ugh did I just say that? Sorry. I know it’s so lame! I can’t help it. I’ve tried. It would take years of therapy. I just don’t care that much.
As I’m typing this WordPress is suggesting a related article about vacuuming naked. WITW? I’m not into that. Just so we’re clear.
Happy cleaning my followers. Happy cleaning.