Is There Only One Funny Chick Left?

Hi Everyone,

Chick E here.  It’s been awhile.  Sawree.  :/

Here are some things that have been going on:

  • Everyone has been sick, per usual this time of year.  Revisit last year’s post about this with me, would you?
  • The Patriots won the Super Bowl.  Thank God.  I wasn’t going to be able to continue living in New England if they lost a third.  I don’t really care, but I certainly enjoy the bragging rights afforded me by living in “Title Town”.  You know what that is, right?  It’s what they call Boston because we win everything, all the time.

He wins the Super Bowl of Hotness Every Year.

  • We’ve had a butt-load of snow.  A “butt-load” of snow is 42″ in two weeks.  And another foot coming next week.  I feel like I live in Buffalo, a city I used to enjoy making fun of because of their butt-load of snow.

  • The Chicks have continued to commit to, and fail at, eating well and werking out.  Maybe Chick A has been doing a bit better.  Maybe.  I haven’t really followed up with her on that.
  • The Chicks have purchased tickets to go see NKOTB.  If you don’t know what that means, please stop reading this blog.  (I’m kidding, don’t ever stop reading this blog).  We are SO excited, and looking for any large NKOTB buttons any of you might let us borrow for the event.  We want to wear as many as possible.

  • My most favorite boots broke.  No reason to be sad though, I bought a replacement pair, and a backup pair, in a different color.  I now own this boot in all three colors.  This is seriously the best boot I have ever owned.  It’s a couple seasons old now though so it’s tough to find.  I should buy a backup pair to my backup pair…

  • I got into a fight with a yoga instructor.  Just a verbal confrontation, because I didn’t want my Karma to be totally f’d, which it would have been if I had knocked her out.  She totally deserved it though. G takes ballet, in a building that houses many other businesses, one of which is a pretentious yoga studio.  Every weekend, right before class, the ballet kids and moms get the same, uptight warning from the yoga teacher “please keep it down out here, there is a class in session”.  Yoga and ballet share a common lobby.  And every week, the kids run around and make noise, because guess what?  They’re kids!  Sorry yoga B, but my child is not going to sit quietly on a chair while waiting to go into her class with her friends.  This particular weekend, the yoga B caught me after many, many hours of shoveling snow and being trapped inside.  It went something like this:
    • G: (gracefully leaping in the lobby, in snow boots, so sort of loudly)
    • Yoga B to G: (puts her obnoxiously large sign up that says “Yoga class in session.  Please speak softly. Thank you!”) Can you please not run?  There is a class in session and the sound carries.
    • Me: (stare of death at yoga B) I think it might be time  you think about moving to another location.
    • Yoga B: (stare of confusion at me)
    • Me: We have this conversation every weekend.  She’s just a kid.  She’s not doing anything wrong.
    • Yoga B: Ma’am, I’m not sure why you’re being so rude and getting so upset.  I asked her very politely.
    • Me: And on that note, don’t speak to my daughter.  If you have an issue, speak to me.

It was a bit more than that but now that I’ve left my angry state, I can’t remember it all.  Just know that G was not being obnoxious, simply being 5, and that yoga B hates kids.  I don’t think she ever even was a kid.  Also, aren’t you yoga people supposed to be really good at focusing?  Isn’t that the entire point of yoga?  And if so, then how can people talking in a  common area be so GD distracting to you?  And if it is, then don’t hold or attend yoga classes in a building that houses many other businesses.  #endrant

And lastly, mostly due to all of the preceding…

  • I have eaten 45 pints of ice cream.

A brief synopsis of the life of Chick E.

I’ll write more when the snow melts…so…2016ish.

-Chick E

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