Chick Confessions: 10 Things Chick E Doesn’t Care About.

Chick A caught a lot of flak (I had to Google this phrase) for her post about 10 things she just doesn’t care about.  I can’t let her suffer alone.  We are, after all, a team.  So here are some things that I just don’t care about, that I feel a lot of you out there might hate me for.  Ready?  Ready to get all worked up?? Let’s go.

  1. Dogs: I can already feel the anger…Listen.  It’s not that I hate dogs.  I don’t run a dog fighting ring or anything.  I’m not Michael Vick.  I just don’t enjoy dogs.  I think they smell.  And they lick everything.  When I go to your house, I do not enjoy your dog licking me.  That dog was probably just licking its own butthole.  So there you go.  I get it, they’re very sweet and lovable (to some) and make great companions (to some).  Just not to me.  AND THAT’S OK!!!  Also, I never ever ever want to have to carry a bag of sh*t around with me as I take a walk.  When I see people doing that, I absolutely cannot understand it.  You are literally walking around, holding a bag of feces.  Fun.

  2. Concerts:  Other than that one time the Chicks went to see NKOTB, I don’t ever care to see live music.  For some of you, that is soooooooooo hard to process.  It’s just so loud.  And smelly.  And hot.  And there are so many people.  And I can listen to all of the same music at home.  Alone.  In the quiet.  With a beer that did not cost $12.

  3. Eating Organic:  I have yet to hop on this bandwagon.  I don’t actually believe the “organic” designation even really means anything.  I have some conspiracy theories about this, but won’t go into that here.  I do, however, believe in eating local.  I think that’s much more sensible than paying $45 for one organic apple.


    Oh, that’s an organic banana?  You don’t say…

  4. Art:  Here is one Chick A and I can agree on.  My daughter loves art.  My neighbor is an amazing artist and teaches art.  I can barely draw a circle.  Besides not being able to make art, I have a hard time finding an appreciation for it.  It’s sort of all the same to me.  It’s something I’m going to try working on though, ok?  Maybe I’ll even hit up a museum one day (shakes head no).

  5. New Cell Phones:  This one drives me nuts.  It’s like the SECOND a new phone drops, people are losing their GD minds.  Losing them.  Who cares????  The only reason I would care, would be if I were still carrying this around:

    zach morris

    This is basically how big cell phones are again, by the way…

  6. The Show “Dancing with the Stars”:  You guys, this show is still on TV.  For reals.  It’s on season 284.  They’re running out of washed up celebrities though, so next season we may see celebs such as extras and key grips from Lost, the guy who plays that big horn in the Ricola commercials, the actor who played Elvin on The Cosby Show, and the actress who played Vicki from Small Wonder.

  7. Pop Culture:  If went away, forever, I would be so happy.  If Entertainment Tonight went away, forever, I would not shed one tear.  I couldn’t give two sh*ts what the Kardashians are doing tonight.  I don’t care whether or not Queen Bey used a surrogate.  And I’m sad that I even know that was at one point in time a story.  It’s like you can’t escape it.  It’s everywhere.  This is probably one of the biggest parts of life where Chick A and I differ.  She’ll be all “Can you believe what happened to Jen!?“, as though Jen is some person we both know, when in reality she’s talking about something that happened to Jennifer Aniston.  Or Jennifer Garner.  Or Jennifer Hudson.  Or any of the other famous Jens that Chick A is involved with.

  8. Baseball:  I don’t care about baseball so much that I wrote a blog about it once (you can read it here).  I feel almost as guilty confessing to this one as I do to not loving dogs.  I live in “Red Sox Nation”, where people live and die by the Sox schedule.  They’re all at the games, wearing the gear, singing “Sweet Caroline”, and I’m all “ughhhh, baseball is on AGAIN tonight???”.

    baseball is boring

    I need this.  So badly.

  9. Breastfeeding:  Do it if you want to, don’t do it if you don’t want to.  Whatever  you do, please stop talking about it.  Please.  That is literally all I’m going to say on this topic.  Until I write an entire blog dedicated to it.  Because I will.  I promise.

  10. Traveling:  This one is so hard for so many people I know to relate to.  I wish I cared about traveling, I really do.  I wish I was genuinely interested in visiting foreign lands, but I’m barely interested in visiting the town next door.  I really only go there if I have to.  I had to go to Switzerland for work once, and was in tears because I didn’t want to go.  I barely left my hotel room to explore.  Maybe it’s because I’m not very adventurous.  Maybe it’s because most of the traveling I’ve done has been for work – which isn’t fun, relaxing travel.  Maybe it’s because when traveling for work I’m usually traveling alone, and, call me crazy, but I don’t really feel like exploring strange new cities/states/countries all my myself (AKA I don’t want to get murdered).  Some people eat that up.  They love it.  Not me.  I 100% prefer being at home.  Sorry.  :/

I’ll leave it at 10, so you all might still like me after this.

Also, sorry I’ve been away so long.  I’ve missed you too.  xoxoxoxo

-Chick E

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