Phenomenal Business Plan: The Period Wagon.

I’m kind of an entrepreneur of sorts. I am constantly thinking of businesses that are needed in today’s marketplace.

Let me tell you about the idea I had today.

Today, I’ve been what Chick E and I like to refer to as “Having a High GL” or, “Having a High Grump Level”. My level of grump today is very, very high. (So you know, our GL rules are as follows: The levels are 1 to 1 million. A million is the absolute worst. If you are ever at 1 million, the other Chick must report at once to wherever the other Chick is.) (Either Chick has ever reached this level, but it’s been extremely, extremely close.)

My GL today was caused by my monthly visit by my bitch of an Aunt, Flo. She unexpectedly and without a shred of notice, comes into town last night, in the middle of the GD night, wakes me up out of a dead sleep and I automatically wanted to barf when I realized her arrival. I had to jump out of bed before she hopped in with me and made a permanent mess of things, she can sometimes be a total disaster.

Throughout the day today, I struggled with my delirious and rageful Aunt. Let me just make some bullet points for you…

  • For breakfast I wanted all the food. I wanted a smoothie in the cafeteria at work, but I know they are ladened with more sugar than a Halloween pillowcase, so I made the decision before I saw them that if it was the “yellow” one, I would get it, if not, I would make a good choice and not get it. (I’m assuming “yellow” is pineapple something.) It was red. So, not yellow. I was not happy.

  • Due to something somewhat minor at work, that normally would just slightly annoy me, today, instead, I cried. I cried to my boss. And her cubemate. And said something totally lame to them like, “I just take a lot of pride in my work!” (through tears) OMG. I am soooo lame.

  • Someone made a huge mess of water on the counter in the bathroom at work, so when I leaned in, my shirt got all wet. I almost f’ing lost my mind.

  • I found a hole in the armpit of one of my favorite shirts, I almost lost my f’ing mind.

  • On the ride home, my radio stopped working in my car, the display screen froze and then went black and I pulled over to turn my car on and off to see if that would reboot it….it didn’t. I’ve had the car for 10 days. I almost lost my f’ing mind.

  • Because Flo doesn’t give one crap about my finances or health, I came home from work and bought a new purse online and ate 17 mini peanut butter cups.

    ovary

Oh wait, where was this stupid blog going? Oh yeah…my business idea…SO…there should be a truck, like an ice cream truck, but a lot less creepy…and it would come around the neighborhood and it would know the schedule of everyone’s “Aunt Flo visits” and they’d have purses for sale, really comfy ballet flats and sweatpants and hoodie sweatshirts, as well as cupcakes, french fries, pizza and yes, ice cream. Oh yeah, and Midol and every level of Kotex there is. Because you always think you’ve got all the supplies you need….and you never, ever do. This truck, we’ll call it the, “Aunt Flo’s A Bitch Wagon“…that truck would make BANK.

So, that’s my idea…

You’re welcome,

-Chick A (And Stupid Aunt Flo)

 

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