I started out this year with three goals. Not resolutions, I don’t like resolutions. I always picture someone standing at the top of a mountain with a flag and loudly proclaiming, “I RESOLVE NEVER TO EAT DONUTS EVER AGAIN!!!!‘ and stabbing the flag pole into the ground aggressively, with this big, goofy grin on their face.
After 20+ years of making the same goals and having the same results, I was like…eh…that’s dumb. So, I made 3 totally different goals than I’ve ever made. In hopes (secretly, to myself) that these 3 goals would still help me with my “usual” goals. You know, lose weight, workout, eat better, be awesomer. So I chose these 3 goals: Meditate every day, Drink half my weight in ounces of water per day, and lastly, sleep at least 8 hours per night. None of this, eat right/workout mumbo jumbo…that’s for chumps.
All that said, I will also admit, that my family mentioned that they were going to do this “Whole30” challenge. Have you heard of it? It’s where you basically detox your body from sugar and other toxins for 30-days to retrain your brain from the evil grips it has on sugar, carbs, and processed foods. (Funny aside: I had no plans on doing this challenge until New Year’s Eve. I knew my Mom & one sister were doing it, as I had ordered the book for my Mum on Amazon…anyways, I wasn’t going to buy the book but then a bottle of Prosseco later, and it was magically in my cart and on its way, thanks, Amazon Prime…and Trader Joe’s cheap Prosecco!)
The book arrived on January 2nd and I really was excited to try this for 30-days. I had been on a crazy bender of ginger snap cookies, Doritos, cereal, and hella bagels and yes, cheap Prosecco from Trader Joe’s for the past, oh, I don’t know, 2-months and knew my time living like I was dying had to come to an end. But, I couldn’t start January 3rd! No. I needed to figure out when I was going to be able to commit to 30 days. I just needed a window of time to prepare, you know? Like, eat all the food in the house that I shouldn’t have had in the house to begin with. You know how that is, don’t say you don’t. (Goodbye, Wheat Thins, goodbye Little Debbie’s Nutty Buddies…sniff…) So, I decided to begin on Monday, January 8th. Then, in bed on the night of January 7th, a light bulb appeared. I can’t not drink at my spouses birthday party!! That would be SO rude of me and not to mention, SO boring. That party was on January 13th. So, I thought I should bump my start date out to Monday, January 15th, for hangover’s safety sake. (I know, I know, there’s so many obvious red flags and issues with this whole start date thing, I know…I know…let’s just move on…)
So, January 15th arrives, my Whole30 Program book had arrived a couple weeks earlier and I still hadn’t read it…but what does that matter, I kinda knew what I was doing, I’ll leave the “rules” for later. I made a chart in my office to inspire and motivate me (see below) with a whole key of how to grade each day to get an entire smiley face each challenge day…yeah, that’s right, I’m a nerd. It’s fine.
And so, the 30 days began. (And before I get any comments about how I should do this or that or shouldn’t do this or that or all I need to do is or you shouldn’t blah blah blah…I appreciate you trying to push your opinions on me under the guise of caring about me but it’s okay, we’re cool…thanks. 🙂 )
If you’ve been an avid reader of this blog, or if you know me at all (if you know me, you really should be reading my blog so I know you care about me…) then you know that I have been on a lifelong journey to lose weight, find a happy and balanced relationship with food and with the terrible, a-hole monster that lives inside my brain that says things like, “You need MORE cookies or you won’t be happy” or “If you can’t be perfect with your diet & exercise, just don’t even bother!” And I’ve blogged about this many, many, many times. Exhibits A, B, & C: Week 1: Back On The Train. Kinda. or Bruises From My Hard Fall Off The Train. or Oh Weird, Another Blog About Chick A’s Weight Loss Journey?
So, tomorrow will be one week with my 2018 Goals in effect. And guess what? Ugh. I feel great. Why that face? Why the negativity? Well, that’s a bit for the comedic effect but truly it’s because…I knew I would. I’m not a dummy. I’m someone who has tried to lose the weight 40 times, been successful 75% of the time, at least for a time-period. Lost 65 pounds at least 4 times and then gained it all back and then some. Read many books, many theories, have had therapies to assist me, have tried many techniques, formats, and programs. I know that eating well and making healthy choices in your daily life leads to feeling amazing; body, mind & soul. And I already feel that way, after not even a week! I just haven’t found what works best for me for the long haul. But I’ve learned, through all of this, what at least, doesn’t work for me. So, I’m weeding out. I know for sure, that sugar is the devil for me. The devil that calls to me at all times of the day and that one toe in the sugary water leads to a plethora of other toes. Like, all the toes. Okay, like, I just jump in and frolick about in Sugar Lake until my head hurts, I can’t keep my eyes open, I want to punch someone in the face and also, eat more sugar. It’s not pretty.
So, with Whole30, for 30 days, I’m eating pretty simply. Veggies, fruits, meat & seafood, nuts, eggs, and a whole lotta avocado! (I love you, avocado.) And with the elimination of sugar and carbs completely, I feel fully charged. Compared to my maybe 50% charged on the devilish stuff. I feel motivated and energetic. I feel like the monster inside my brain is on vacation, hopefully somewhere terrible…like Florida in August or a cruise.
The issue at hand is this: I know for sure I can do this for 30 Days. No problem. I mean, I gotta get all 30 smiley faces on my board, right? (By the way, did you see how on January 16th, I have a black smile? That is because I was in my car traveling from one client to another and had a slice of gum to freshen up the ole breath. Seems unproblematic, right?? Nope. Can’t have gum on this challenge. (It’s all about training your psyche to not crave sugar, so no gum, no stevia (said goodbye to coffee for this one), no nothin’.) So, per the Whole30 regulations (Yes, I eventually read the book…or like, “skimmed” would be a more accurate word) if you eat something during the challenge that isn’t allowed, you have to start over at Day 1. (Thank God I was only on Day 2!!) So, thus, the sad face and the notation to remind me of my transgression, “GUM”.
Today is Sunday, the 21st. As you can see above, I’ve only accumulated 1 eye for sleeping 8 hours last night. I still need to meditate, drink the rest of my water, and continue to not eat all the candy leftover from Christmas in our family candy spot. (Funny aside: I made brownies for my kids this weekend and utilizing every ounce of my power, I DIDN’T LICK ANYTHING. I wish I could have recorded my inner voice during the process of making these delicious looking brownies whilst not licking my fingers or the rubber spatula or the little drop of brownie batter that fell onto my counter. It was…intense. But, then after, when they were in the oven and I was over the hurdle (I don’t really care about baked brownies, just brownie batter…is that weird?) I felt like I was the strongest woman in the universe! I can do ANYTHING, I was thinking to myself!
Also, the water thing? It truly is huge. Drinking a lot of water throughout the day has made me less hungry and I can already see it on my skin, in just one week.
Also, the sleep thing? This is also HUGE. I really do believe that when I am tired, I eat the most. I graze and graze. Trying to keep my energy level up. And not to mention, I am not a crabby baby jerkface when I’m getting enough sleep. So, bonus.
Also, the meditation thing? First off, it’s SO hard. My brain is literally like a confetti cannon of thoughts and emotions. All shooting off all around the inside of my brain at 100 mph. It’s exhausting, I’m sure many of you can relate. So, it’s hard to quiet your mind and focus on just your breath, even for just 10 minutes, which is how long I am currently doing per day on my guided mediations app called Calm. (Check it out!) It’s SO hard. As I sit there, I’m saying inside my head, “Breeeaaattthhheeee…” followed quickly by…(Say the next sentence really fast) I gotta remember to add this to my website and send out thank you cards and what’s my meal plan for this week and I gotta pick up some D batteries and I have to remember to…and then I catch myself and (sometimes literally) visualize those horse blinder things so that I can get back to focusing my attention on my breath, on my finding inner peace and stuff. But, that’s why they call it a “meditation practice” you have to practice. But, just attempting to silence your frantic brain for 10 minutes, even if I figure that I get a combined total of 1 minute of focus, I’m bettering myself and it’ll only continue to get better and longer. (That’s what she said. Ugh. Shut up, stupid brain demon!)
I need these for my meditation practice.
(The blinders AND that killer mascara!)
So, that’s my life in a nutshell right now. After the 30 days is up, I intend to incorporate a moderate amount of the items that are not allowed in the 30-days. I plan to take this type of nutrition format, that is very helpful and beneficial to me in my life, and just add a few of the things that I love (Cocktails, bread, and chocolate, and yes, gum) but just in small amounts and once in a while.
I’m excited. I’m motivated. I’m continuing to search for ways to keep this thing going. This train to Healthytown, USA. Knowing that it’s a train ride that lasts forever and has many bumps, bruises, and many bar cars along the way. I’ll try to remember that I don’t need to aim for perfection, just progress. (Tell that to the guy or gal that said I had to start all over for have a SLICE OF GUM!! Geez!)
How’re your 2018 goals going so far?