The Weird, Stressful, Scary, Ridiculous Things About Me. Part Two.

Hello, there! Happy Sunday! I’m back for Part Two of my list, “25 Things About Me”. If you didn’t read last week’s list, numbers 25-20, click here to do so.

Why am I doing this? Well, the answer is extensively spelled out in last week’s blog but the short answer is that I believe that being 100% authentic, open, and honest about who you are and what life is like for you and sharing that with others, can create change. People feel less alone, less like they’re the only ones in the world who…have some of the crazy, weird, stupid, obnoxious issues that you have. That way, we all can feel like weirdos…together. 🙂

So, here we go…the next 5 things about me!

19. I feel like I’m a fraud with my new business. I started my business almost 2 years ago. It’s called, “Your ABstract Assistant” and I help people to make their lives less stressful, and find solutions to their every day challenges through being a Professional Organizer, Personal & Virtual Assistant, Event Planner, and many other menu items. (See the full list here.) Anyways, being a business owner is like, the weirdest thing. I wrote a blog about that a couple weeks ago too, read here. I’m just kinda flying by the seat of my pants all the time. I feel like I’m “playing” business. Like I used to do when I was a kid. Scheduling appointments with clients, sketching ideas for projects, trying to pull together some social media marketing ideas. It’s like, who do I think I am?? A #bosslady?? And the answer is, yes. I do. I even have a pen to prove it. I just wonder, when will I ever feel like a legit entrepreneur?? Like, a grown-up one?

18. I have been a lifelong binge eater. This isn’t something that happens all the time. I’ve gotten it mostly under control in the last few years or so but I do have bouts still. I’ve written many a blog about my struggles with my weight and weight loss journey and I’ve talked about how my perfectionism causes me to be either 100% ON or 100% OFF. I’m either doing great or terrible. I’ve yet to find that nice balance. So, sometimes when I’m “off” I just can eat and eat and eat. A bowl of cereal, some cookies, another bowl of cereal, two pieces of toast, some chocolate from last Halloween that I found in a drawer, maybe make some mac n cheese, a bag of chips…I’m serious. It’s like an out of body experience. My brain is screaming at me, “STOPPPPP!!!!” and “You’re going to be sick!!” but I don’t stop, it’s like I can’t. It sucks. I’ve definitely dealt with and continue to deal this issue in therapy. (Another thing I like to be open and honest about because the stigma of mental health therapy needs to end so that people can get the emotional and mental health that every person on the planet needs. #enough)

17. I used to live in Florida. From about 1997-2003ish. I used to be very drawn to organized religion. I’ve always been very spiritual and had a very close connection with God but for a while there I thought I could get closer to God through some sort of church experience. A girl I worked with at the time went to a church called, get this, “Faith World”…so close to Disney World, it seemed appropriate, I guess. This church was like nothing I had ever, I mean, ever…experienced before. Not even close. It was amazing. HUGE building, more like a campus. Great music, that was my favorite part. It was like a live concert every Sunday. People coming together to connect with kindness and love, it was great. But there were some drawbacks for me. There was constant asking for money, a lot of talk about how tithing would get you closer to God, make your life better. Listen, I’m not a Biblical expert and I know there are passages in there about giving to your church but the pressure that was put onto the congregation was intense and I didn’t like it. But I hung in there for the great music, the way the service mostly made me feel, and the comradery of it all. Until the day that I brought my Mum who was visiting me, who was already a bit skeptical of my newfound evangelical-esque church and had asked if they did that thing where people are pushed in the head to knock out Satan and I told her, absolutely not! It wasn’t like that! Until it was. The one time my Mum came with me and sure enough, the pastor was hitting people in the head to knock out Satan. I was mortified. That was the last day I was a member of Faith World.

16. I think about dying every day. I was diagnosed with heart disease in March of 2009 and had a small heart attack. Read more about that here. Every day since then, for the most part, I haven’t actually kept track, but every day is pretty close, I’d imagine…I think about dying. Will today be the day? How will it happen? What will it feel like? I hope I’m not naked. I hope I’m not driving. What will my funeral be like? (I have it mostly all planned out already.) It’s an exhausting thing to think about every day. Again, dealing with that as well with my trusted therapist.

15. I hate brushing my teeth. Uggggghhh…I just hate it. I don’t even know why. I think mostly because it’s just so boring. You just stand there with this thing in your mouth…and I’m thinking, “Am I even doing this right??” I know it sounds so dumb. Whenever I tell my kids about the importance of brushing one’s teeth, I feel like such a hypocrite. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely brush my teeth every day. And, 53% of the time I do it twice a day. But, I’ll be totally honest with you, when my dentist asks me, “Are you flossing regularly?” and I say, “Not always but often.” I’m totally lying. Because the only thing worse than brushing your teeth is flossing your teeth. It’s so hard.

Okay, so…there we have it. This Sunday’s list of Things About Me. What do you think? I would absolutely LOVE it if you’d comment here in the comment section below or the Facebook post or the Instagram post about what you relate to and why. Do you hate brushing your teeth? Have you ever felt like you were unknowingly a part of a religious cult? Let me know!

Thanks for reading, and I’ll be back next Sunday to carry-on the list with numbers 14-10!

Heart you,

-Chick A